Blog

As a leader it’s essential that you don’t put “the cart before the horse”. We know that doesn’t work. And jumping into action when you feel anxious and overwhelmed, before you’ve developed a constructive mindset, is like putting the cart before the horse. Think about it: Historically, when your performance has been less-than-great, wasn’t itRead more

The greatest gift you can give anyone, both as a leader and as a person on the planet, is to be fully present when they’re talking to you. Be 100% present. Hear what they’re saying. Hear what’s behind what they’re saying. And hear what they’re not saying. Regardless of whether they’re telling you about theRead more

It’s frustrating, and impossible to be a good leader, when people aren’t hearing you, right? But, worse still, you can’t expect to make impressive, progressive career steps if you don’t have a reliable method for getting people to: First, care about what you’re saying, and Second, be open-mined about seeing things your way. (I thinkRead more

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the ability to notice and influence one’s own and others’ emotions. It involves competencies such as emotional self-awareness, self-regard, empathy, assertiveness, stress tolerance, flexibility and optimism.   Recently I was told about two senior executives who, in a meeting with their team members, declared that they didn’t have high EQ. One ofRead more

You know that “squinty eyed” feeling you get when you’re talking with someone you don’t entirely trust, don’t you? You put so much energy into figuring out where they’re coming from and what they really want, you’re not entirely listening to what they’re saying. Because you’re busy trying to guess their end-game you’re: Not fullyRead more

I’ve loved receiving your comments and feedback on my Leadership Blogs throughout the year. Thank you for your thoughts and for your appreciation :-). You’ve indicated that the most valuable Leadership Blogs in 2017 have been the three I’ve linked below… How To Put Things Right When Someone’s Peeved With You   You so oftenRead more

Leaders are quite consistent when they talk about their biggest challenges, frustrations and problems (as my latest survey confirmed). “Managing upwards” is nearly always near the top of the list. It’s a struggle for lots of different reasons—your boss hasn’t taken the time to understand your challenges, they think they have all the answers, they don’tRead more

  Are you curious about how you compare to other leaders—particularly your struggles and challenges? A few weeks ago, responses rolled into my questionnaire (thank you!) about your greatest leadership challenges and development needs. “If you were to choose only one leadership area to further develop, what would it be? Here’s how the answers stackedRead more

After examining bucket-loads of literature and observing behaviours, I have no doubt that the sure-fire way to influencing someone is to—here it is—be committed to their success! When I say “influence”, I don’t mean a self-centered manipulation that results in you getting what you want and the other party being screwed. I mean a positiveRead more

Here’s what Seth Godin said: “We spend a lot of time talking about celebrities and how attractive they are. Paul Newman’s blue eyes, how tall is Jake Gyllenhaal, how fast is Usain Bolt. Most of the time, though, our success is based on something we have far more control over: Our emotional attractiveness. People who areRead more

It’s a challenge if you lead a team that’s been told their expense budget has been slashed and that their headcount is now frozen. To achieve your business goals, you’ll therefore need every team member to work smarter, faster, harder and longer, won’t you? Ah! That’ll mean they need be engaged, at a heart level,Read more

A lot has been written over the years, even by me, about how to influence another person. After examining a few bucket-loads of literature, asking lots of questions, observing behaviours, and checking it out in practice, there’s no doubt that the sure-fire way to influencing someone is to—here it is—be committed to their success! WhenRead more

It doesn’t matter what you call it….. honesty—authenticity—candour—integrity—frankness—truthfulness—openness—sincerity—genuineness It’s a prerequisite if you’re to be trusted by people.   Honesty and Influence Here’s the thing… It’s essential that other people trust you if you plan to be influential. Influencing is damn hard if they don’t. They’ll spend their time looking at you through squinty eyes,Read more

To be frank, I’m amazed at how many people step around difficulties. Even some otherwise impressive leaders are doing it.Don’t get me wrong. I’m not encouraging you to be too challenging or to take a win/lose approach. My problem is that way too many leaders are putting their head in the sand and pretending theRead more

Scripting how a leader can influence-someone-to-do-something is the norm in my office. It’s a topic that’s put on the coaching table almost everyday. And the success rate of these leaders when they leave my office is so impressive. (I love this stuff!) Let’s look at the crucial foundation stones of this success… The Most ImportantRead more

Here’s a template that’ll pull things together for you when you want to influence people to adopt your thinking. It’s called an “Influence Map”. You’ll find it clever but simple and effective to use. You can use it in a macro way, say “to be a more influential leader”. Or you can use it in aRead more

Listening without an intent (that is, your sole purpose, your only immediate outcome, is to hear what the other person’s saying) takes guts. It takes courage. And it takes patience. Listening-without-intent also takes practice. Think about it… How often are you currently “listening while waiting to speak?” Or “listening to understand”? Or “listening with theRead more

It Was Clear That The Two In The Next Meeting Room Were In Trouble… Overhearing was inevitable from my adjacent room—and things weren’t going well for them! Interestingly, when you only hear the voice it’s so easy to notice the underlying attitudes, isn’t it? The flavor of their communication, especially the bad habits they’d bothRead more

Leaders who don’t master conflict are leaders who grapple with managing their tension and stress—and who unwittingly stall their careers. You’re reading a great article for you if: You feel nervous, or even powerless, when conflict strikes, or You find yourself side-stepping hard-to-handle, difficult situations, or You have an inkling that your success, and yourRead more

So often leaders and others struggle to know how to construct a convincing argument. Let’s look at how you can make that construction process a whole lot easier… Let’s say you and I are working together on Project A—and I want us to put Project A on hold and work on Project B. I’m aboutRead more